Wedding

 At one time, there was a story in our village that allegedly happened to our fellow villager. The man went to a friend in a neighboring village to help with construction. After work, he was treated to moonshine and offered to stay the night, but he decided to go home, although it was late. The distance between the villages was about seven kilometers, and it was necessary to go through apiaries, where houses stood in some places. And so, passing through the apiary, the man noticed that in one house people were walking, there was a lot of noise, songs and dances. Then the drunk wanted to "continue the banquet," and he went into the house.

It turns out that a Mari wedding was taking place in the house — who doesn't know, they are attended by a crowd in national costumes and with national songs, but according to Mari customs. Well, the man began to walk and dance with them. He was fed, watered— and everything was as it should be. However, the man vaguely noticed during the feast that the wedding was somehow strange - no blessings, no mention of God.

At the end of the wedding, according to custom, small gifts are given to the guests (mostly from clothes). The man was given a shirt and told to try it on right here. He, out of habit, said: "Lord, have mercy!" he began to put on his shirt.

And then he woke up. There was no wedding. There was silence around him, and he was standing on a wooden chair in an empty house and he put a rope around his neck — all he had to do was twitch. It is unknown what would have happened if he had tried on the "shirt" without prayer. And later he realized that he was eating manure instead of pies.

I think it's not for nothing that people say: if it seems, cross yourself.

One for the road

 It was 22.58 on the clock. Maria became nervous: the table was set, everything was arranged, but there were still no guests... The drunken neighbors had been buzzing for an hour, and Chinese pyrotechnics were constantly exploding in the streets, but she was not in the mood for fun. It's impossible to have fun alone, you know. I've already dialed Marinka's number for the umpteenth time: unavailable and unavailable. Who said they'd be here by ten o'clock? After Marinka, I dialed all the others — they are also unavailable. Attributing this to the telecom operators, Maria opened a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. She hadn't even had a sip when the doorbell rang. Smiling happily, she opened the door to her guests.

The usual cheerful noise and uproar that is inherent in the Russian New Year began. Masha was immediately presented with a huge beautiful postcard, but they did not let her read the congratulations. Everyone was already pretty tipsy, except for the driver Alexei. Marinka had already had a fight with her husband Nikolai (it was a common thing for them, and as soon as they live together). Katya could barely hold her restless husband Mikhail, who kept trying to light a sparkler out of nowhere.

Finally, Maria managed to calm everyone down and put them at the table. She looked at her watch: 23.18. She raised her glass first.: "Let's spend the old year as soon as possible, there are forty minutes left before the new one." The toast was well received, and soon the second, third, and fourth were said. They didn't even have time to look around, as it was already 23.56. They immediately started looking for the remote control: everyone was screaming about the president's congratulations. Having finished his short speech, the president raised a glass of champagne. Chimes appeared on the TV. The whole company raised their glasses in unison and began chanting, "Happy New Year!" When the chimes struck twelve, Maria screamed alone. The others fell silent with a smile on their face.

"What are you guys doing?"  Maria asked in surprise.

After a short silence, Nikolai replied:

— On the staff!

"What kind of stick?" Guys, it's New Year's Eve!  Masha replied with a smile.

— On the staff! — all the others echoed Nikolai.

Maria looked at her friends in amazement:

"Is this some kind of prank?"

"You know, Masha," said Alexey, the sober driver. — We have to go now. Sorry. That's why they drank on the staff.

— Yes, yes! It's time for us to go! — the others supported it.

Maria just blinked in surprise. I thought, "Have you prepared some kind of surprise?" Everyone wished her happiness, good luck and love in the New Year and left. She waited ten minutes. Twenty. Thirty. No one came back. Taking a bottle of champagne, Maria sat down on the sofa and began to drink it slowly in the company of the TV. When she finished it, tears welled up in her eyes; "What are they doing to me...right?".

Suddenly the phone rang. She smiled: they didn't leave me after all. But no, the screen said, "Anya."

"Hello?"

— Masha! It's just a nightmare! I haven't been able to reach you for the second hour! Why didn't you call me and tell me?

— What did you call? What did she say?  Maria asked in amazement.

"Are you crazy?" Marina, Kolya, Katya, Misha, and Lyosha are gone!

"Why not?" They left me half an hour ago...

They started crying on the phone.

— Masha, what's wrong with you? Why are you kidding me? They crashed at twenty minutes past eleven, the car was thrown into a ditch, caught fire, they could not save anyone... And you're talking... — choking on sobs, Anya hung up the phone.

Uncomprehending, Masha went to the kitchen to get a bottle of vodka, and as she walked down the hall, she noticed a postcard on the table. Oh, yes, she was never allowed to read it. Now she has succeeded. Closing the postcard, she went into the kitchen on shaky legs, poured herself a glass and immediately drank it. In the postcard, in addition to the banal printed congratulations, it read:

"I'm sorry for what happened, it's not our fault. But don't worry. I'll see you soon, because you forgot to close the door. Happy New Year!"

There were some strange sounds near the front door, at the same time similar and unlike the sound of footsteps in the usual sense. It was more like the footsteps of a broken mannequin. The door opened. The smell of burning meat entered the apartment. Masha turned away from the door and filled a glass. The "footsteps" were getting closer. Masha closed her eyes and raised her glass.

The "footsteps" stopped behind her.

— On the staff!  She managed to whisper with just her lips.

How I guarded the office

Once I was guarding the office at night. My duties were minimal — to make sure that no one broke in (I'm a noble drish, but if someone had managed to break down this unrealistic iron door at night, even a riot policeman would hardly have been able to stop him, so I was there rather for form's sake), to let the authorities in and also to keep the ceiling from flowing — sometimes there The pipes on the second floor were bursting. And once a week it is necessary to wash the windows from the inside. In general, the job is simple and dust-free. And there were computers with all sorts of simple toys, like "Heroes of Might and Magic," and I didn't need any more. I spent my nights in this office from Saturday to Sunday. Everything was always quiet, only the director, some manager and me had the keys.

One Saturday, I was sitting behind the heroes and suddenly something rustled on the other side of the door. Once. I went over and looked through the peephole, but there was no one there. I decided that they had passed by and returned to the game, but before I could sit down on a chair, something scratched again and I heard a completely unintelligible male voice and a knock on the door. I thought it was the director, so I put the keys in. I turned it one turn and looked through the peephole again — there was no one there. I said loudly, "First name, patronymic, is that you?" There is silence in response. I turned the key back, and immediately a voice came from the other side of the door—a woman's voice this time, again I didn't understand a word—it seemed to be speaking, but it made no sense syllable by syllable. Then I sent them all through the door loudly and threatened to call the police (I was lying about that — there were no phones inside, I just knew that theoretically there should be a fire alarm button somewhere, I still don't know if it's there or not). About a second after that, the woman's voice stopped and there was a soft knock on the window. I pulled back the blinds and freaked out. No, not just fucked up.

I was scared out of my mind — my legs buckled and I sat down on the floor. There was a man hanging on the grate (I want to think it was a man). Everything about him was completely unnatural. It's like someone has only seen people in movies and made themselves a costume to look like a human and put it on themselves. I can't even begin to determine what gender it was. And as soon as he saw me, he began to speak — first in that feminine voice, then alternating in syllable with a masculine one, then in general, as if the voice came from several sources, with some creaks and rustles. My God, his facial expressions were completely inhuman — he was simultaneously moving all his facial muscles in all possible directions. At the same time, he was banging on the glass with his hands and feet, and he was climbing up. Maybe he had the bars between his knees and was climbing, I don't know. At that moment, it seemed to me that he was taking off. It was perfectly visible, and it hung there for a very long time, probably for a minute, but I couldn't do anything at all — I just sat on the floor and stared at this creature, frozen.

About a minute later, a sudden release came — suddenly the whole cacophony stopped, and he abruptly turned (I swear, he turned his head 100 degrees, right over his shoulder) and froze for a few seconds, staring somewhere, and then abruptly jumped off and saying something in a new, low-vibrating voice, walked away. I couldn't see where he went from the floor. I only had the strength to close the blinds and crawl into a room from which neither the door nor the windows were visible. So, on the floor, I sat until 6 a.m., scared of every rustle, until Artyom's replacement came. I probably looked at him through the peephole for two minutes and asked him to step back or say "something."

In the end, I let him in, and he slapped me on the back of the head, and I just laughed happily and hysterically in response. Anyway, I came home — my parents can't figure out what happened to me — pale, circles under my eyes, weighed myself — I lost seven kilos overnight. Since then, I often don't sleep well at night and have nightmares. No one I know will laugh, not a word, not a hint...

Fortune-telling on Christmas night

 We have a strange ceremony for unmarried girls in our village on Christmas Night. The girlfriends come out, twist the girl and she throws a boot in some direction. Whichever way the boot falls, the groom will come to the girl from that side. And in order to find out for sure about your beloved, you need to go in that direction and ask the first man you meet his name.

Maybe once the girls took it seriously, but the girls and I were just fooling around. Already walking towards the center of our town, we giggled and had fun, anticipating the entertainment. I took an old boot from my grandmother, and it was in these boots that she married my grandfather. We drove the guys away to caroling sweets to us, and we gathered in a circle. We promoted my first girlfriend, she threw a boot, almost hitting the girls. Laughter rang out throughout the village.

I was next in line. They blindfolded me and handed me a boot. When I was being twisted, I remembered my grandmother's proverb: "I'm spinning in place, I want to find out my fate, where the boot will fall – my darling will come from there." I honestly can't understand why these words came to mind, because I hadn't even thought about them before. I dropped the boot, and my friends laughed. As it turned out, I threw it far away. My friends sent me in that direction, while they giggled and discussed further actions.

I stomped down the path, looking for my boots in a snowdrift. A little ahead, I saw the silhouette of a man – he called me. I wasn't scared at all, I knew everyone in the village, and I had nothing to be afraid of. To my surprise, the man was a stranger to me, but he was holding my boot in his hand and smiling. I went up to him and said, "Hello, what's your name?" He smiled and said, "My name is Andrey, and yes, that's what your husband's name will be, but I'm here to warn you not to contact Vladimir in any way." He handed me a boot and told me that my friends were waiting for me. I turned for a second to look at the girls–they were walking right towards me. When I turned around to thank the stranger, there was no one there.

To my surprise, my girlfriends didn't see anyone. It was very strange, and we decided to stop this entertainment. During the fun in the company, everything was quickly forgotten. Two whole years have passed and suddenly I have two boyfriends: Vladimir and Andrey. Vova conquered me with his love of freedom, he rode me on a motorcycle, and Andrei was domestic, but very kind. In the end, I chose Andrey. I married him, and after a while I found out that Vova died riding a motorcycle.

Demonic lust

 It happened on the night of January 12, 2005, when I was sleeping with my husband in our bedroom. So, I was sleeping, and then, as if in a dream, someone started kissing and hugging me. It was so pleasant to me – just an unearthly pleasure; I was shaking all over, I wanted a man so much, and I woke up from this unbearable desire. I clearly saw my sleeping husband and thought in perplexity: "Then who is doing this to me?" But immediately pushed this thought away, as the desire drove me crazy and I began to feel the mysterious stranger. There was something shapeless under my hands, and besides, it was completely covered with long quills, like a porcupine's. The most amazing thing was that this creature was also asexual!

I was still feverish with desire, but then I had an epiphany: I sat up in bed, clearly realizing that this was not a dream, and saw a creature crawling into my bed. I don't know where the strength came from, but I grabbed It, threw it on the floor and began to baptize him. After each sign of the cross, It decreased right in front of my eyes and then disappeared completely. I didn't know what kind of creature it was, but I sensed it in my gut–a devil's spawn. So, I think, a 46-year-old woman almost gave herself to a porcupine.

No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't wake my husband up until morning, and in the morning I told him everything. Of course, he waved his hand, saying, well, you always have something. It's easy to dismiss, but you can't get rid of the trouble.

The next day, I had a high fever, became seriously ill, and was admitted to the hospital with a diagnosis of pneumonia. However, later they told me that it wasn't pneumonia at all, and they treated me for everything.… I was sick for almost a year, then nothing happened. But while she was in the hospital, her husband got drunk, and he was kicked out of work. And so it went, and so it went – and to this day misfortune does not leave my house because of this devilish brat that got under my blanket at night.…

The face outside the window

This is the case my wife told me, which happened to her in Tula. My wife works as a lawyer in one of the state institutions. She is often sent on a business trip to another city for advanced training. This time, it was winter, she was sent to the city of Tula.

When she arrived there, she checked into a hotel. The next day, after attending her lecture at work, she walked around the city and returned to the hotel. After undressing and washing, she went to the kitchen to have dinner. When she turned on the TV, she felt that someone was watching her. She turned around, but saw no one. Then she went to the window and pulled back the curtain and immediately jumped back. A girl's face was looking at her from the outside of the window.

Her face was as white as snow. It was only by her blue eyes that my wife identified her as a girl. The wife thought that this simply could not be, her room was on the fourth floor, and looked at the window again. There was still that face in the window. My wife came closer and leaned her hand against the window in front of her face.

The girl smiled maliciously and somehow made the glass shatter into small pieces and immediately disappeared. My wife called the hotel administrator and told him everything. The administrator, of course, did not believe the story, but only said that my wife would pay for the damage. The wife paid and soon flew back. He's going to quit now. She said she couldn't take it anymore.